Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby…

As a pastor, the number one issue in our church that we have dealt with over the last four years (and many more if you count youth pastoring) is sex. Sex before marriage, sex with the wrong person during marriage, and a lack of sex within marriage. It’s a pretty consistent conversation that we have.

I was laying in bed this morning praying for some people who are dealing with some issues related to this topic. I was thinking about how much pain could be erased if everyone obeyed God in just this ONE area. If we were all obedient NOT to have sex before our wedding day, if we stayed away from pornography and affairs, and if we were devoted to our spouses to work through all of the issues within this area of our marriages. Oh, what a much better world we would live in! It’s not the solution to all things, but it would cut out a large percentage of the problems that we have created in our society.

Sexual obedience would drastically cut down on abortions, teen pregnancy (and related finanical burdens on society), sexual addictions, sexually transmitted diseases and the related issues (such as cancer and death). It would cut down our divorce rate, it would cut down our need for counseling, and it would model for our children what God intended sex to be in a healthy context. If we were obedient, sexual abuse would not be as prevelant in our society. Not to mention the social issues that we’ve now created with our young people such as sexting, sending graphic pictures, and God only knows what we’ll come up with next! Just living according to God’s standard of purity in this area would eliminate a great deal of emotional pain and give us a freedom that we can’t imagine.

And yet, time after time, I encounter Christians who minimize God’s standard and try to justify their disobedience in this area. Looking around at society, I am very clear that God nailed this principle. He knew that the gift of sex, when misapplied, was a very dangerous thing. He knew that if we took this principle lightly the ramifications would be life-altering and many times completely devasting. Yes, I know that we’ll all be tempted. I know that it’s hard, but it’s time that we, as Christians, stopped living solely on our feelings and relied on our brains to steer the ship. The rewards are worth the work and quite frankly, we know better.

So, just do it…or don’t. Whichever one applies to your situation.

  1. Donna Hays said:

    Great Blog! Sadly, we don’t always have the choice to abstain – of course this applies to the “everyone in society” living the principles and then innocence wouldn’t be stolen either. It’s the one principle that can save so much heartache but it’s also a principle that requires a lot of grace. We don’t know what or how people came to have the behaviors they have and caring for them with love and understanding is equally important. I feel blessed to raise children with these principles and hopefully protect them in areas I was not protected and love them no matter what the outcome.

  2. Jamie said:

    Love this!! And so plainly true. I have personally watched sexual sin destroy the lives of my family members and through Gods amazing grace and powerful strength I have been able to break that legacy within my own family. So thankful for your frankness with an issue that still makes many giggle or want to cover their ears 🙂

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